Maximum Letdown: Robowarrior (NES)

Even though this is a crappy game and it is a maximum letdown, Jaleco’s Robowarrior holds a special place in my heart. It’s one of the first NES games i got. While it had an interesting premise (and the first level’s music was pretty catchy), all i remember about the game was that it was hard. Not in a Ninja Gaiden my-repeated-failures-want-to-make-me -try-harder-if-for-no-other-reason-than-to-see-what-comes-next kind of hard. Nor is it in a SWAT 4 I-have-to-think-very-very-carefully-about-how-to-approach-this-situation-least-the-whole-mission-ends-up-going-to-hell-in-an-instant kind of hard. Not in a Heavy Rain I-have-to-make-my-onscreen-character-do-things-that-should-be-second-nature-to-a-gamer-but-the-characters-and-story-have-made-me-catch-feelings-like-no-other-game-before-it-so-now-I-am-being-forced-to-make-my-characters-make-extremely-difficult-decisions kind of hard. Not even in a Super Columbine Massacre God-help-me-I-have-to-carry-out-what-was-one-of-the-most-horrific-acts-of-middle-class-suburban-violence-in-the-late-1990s kind of hard. No, it’s a there-are-so-many-idiotic-and-stupid-gameplay-mechanics-I’ll-be-lucky-if-I-can-make-it-past-the-first-level kind of hard.

Robowarrior puts players in the role of ZED, a robowarrior charged with stopping an alien invasion on an artificial planet. The planet was created as a solution to the overcrowding and pollution on Earth, but an alien empire took it over, forcing its people underground and depleting the planet’s resources. The games intro shows the once green and lush planet turning into a barren wasteland within seconds. You don’t need much more motivation than that.

The real fun begins when you land. The stages are made up of hundreds of blocks which have to be blown up to be destroyed. Here is cool part: your bombs can also injure you as well. Oh, and you’re blown back a few squares after setting them, and since they can explode quickly, this makes avoiding them quite difficult. Adding to the frustration is a constant energy drain. If you get hit, you lose even more energy, and you only get one life, so if you mess up, you’re basically screwed.

The level designs further add to the game’s difficulty. Most of them will have you bomb every block searching for a key, an exit, or a crystal, and some of them even repeat sections. You may even stumble down into an underground area which is PITCH BLACK. You can find various items scattered about the levels. Oh yeah, there is also the occasional boss battle.

With a needlessly frustrating difficulty level, Robowarrior pretty much guaranteed that no one who picked up the game would stick around long enough to finish it. However, the music in the first stage was pretty catchy though. In fact, there is a midi remix of it at vgmusic.com. Enjoy!

Interesting tidbit: this game was developed by Hudson Soft. It was known as Bomber King in Japan, where it was marketed as a sequel to Bomberman.