Shit Sandwich.

This game is terrible. I’ve played some dumbed down crap games, but never had an excellent, barnstormer game like Burnout been lost so completely.

The blame lies entirely in the DS hardware. It can’t support Criterions’s “RenderWare” engine. The game engine in its place is some kind of Ridge Racer knock off, very slow, with the added ability to explode on any crash. But with the limited DS capabilities, the crashes don’t entertain or amaze like the Xbox version or whatever.

I don’t even want to talk about it. Its been out for months, but I finally rented it. I really loved Burnout Revenge. I really hate this. I had to post this just in case someone out there might find it in a bargain bin and remember how well reviewed the console versions were.

Its now being hailed at the most anticipated movie of 2007, and its production has been a long time in the making and the subject of much fan speculation, cheer, and frustration.

I have read John Roger’s script, “Pime Directive.” I am going to let you know right now I am a Transformers fan. I’ve read virtually every issue of every comic series, spent thousands on toys, and can recite the 1986 movie word for word. But I’m also a movie fan, and would rather have no new Transformer movie than another terrible summer action movie, and I recognize how even the best adaptations end up shattered promises, failing to deliver on the origins of a great source.

New elements do not puzzle or needlessly change the history of the franchise, but enhance the narrative, allowing the introduction and origin to be told in a more accesible way. The military presence in the movie is felt throughout, and not only does it work, it makes me wonder why the army never took up arms against Transformers before. This does not take away, this does not change, this adds to the story.

Not to say its perfect. In fact, theres 2 characters I don’t really care for at all and could be taken out completely and even losing their expository dialog we’d still have a functional plot and movie. But I do like what I have read. It will not win any academy awards, but it will satisfy a summer movie audience.

Weighing in at 112 pages, this would make the movie, if shot directly from the page, a little less than 2 hours. Fans might not like that it takes a while to really get any Autobots, but the first half of Spiderman and Batman Begins are decidedly without the title hero, so its not that big a deal. It is felt right away this is a movie for Michael Bay when action sequences come with little down time within minutes of the films start. This will be a spectacle film, and I have high hopes the fights suggested on the page translate into elaborate brawls and firefights.

I’m also happy to report the new characters Blackout and Barricade are really cool. Blackout (called “Vortex” in script) is a military attack helicopter, and one of the largest Decepticons. He’s involved very early on in the film, and is interesting enough to make you wonder why any helicopter Transformers of the past had been this well utilized. Barricade (script name “Brawl”) is a high powered police car, and while theres no corny “bad cop” stuff in his dialog or actions, it all really works when put together.

Thats really a ringing endorsement if there ever was one. This movie is not corny. It is not Scooby Doo. Its not Spy Kids. It takes itself seriously whenever possible. The Bumblebee & Spike stuff is bordering on stupid, but Shia LaBeouf is a good comedic actor and he may be able to pull this off. Everyone involved openly says they want to start a new movie franchise, and Michael Bay is anxious to direct a movie kids and parents can both enjoy. I’ve got to have faith they’re not interested in ruining it for the existing fans, and really trying to make new ones.

Continue on for a spoiler-enhanced review.
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On Thursday August 24th 2006 Pluto’s status was downgraded from “planet” to “dwarf planet” taking it out of the ranks of such greats as Earth, Mars and Uranus to name a few! While this decision is being disputed by those with a political interest in having Pluto remain a planet, as Robin Catchpole says “My own personal opinion was to leave things as they were”, for the time being there are only 8 known planets in our fine solar system. But what does this really imply?

Sailor Pluto, one of the 8 Sailor Soldiers sworn to protect the Princess of the Moon and future Queen of Earth, is no longer representative of a planet like her 7 fellow guardians. While she’s always been an outcast of types forced to spend most of her time in solitude protecting the door of time she was still technically ranked equally with the rest. Is Sailor Pluto dead? Does she lose her powers now that she doesn’t have a planet? Will her true star seed which gives her that power be downgraded to a normal one like the rest of the 6 billion people on this planet have? Well… no.

Many are shown to have star seeds who represent celestial bodies which aren’t classified as planets. The most obvious example of this being Sailor Moon herself who, being the most powerfull of soldiers and with a star seed that shines brighter than any other, is only the Sailor of the moon of a planet. Then there’s Phobos and Dymos, Sailor Mars’s crows, who represent the moons of Mars. Luna and Artemis are … a whole other story.

But who else is named after a dwarf planet? Sailor Ceres represents Ceres, a large asteroid in the belt between Mars and Jupiter which is also classified as a dwarf planet. Her and the rest of the former Amazon Quartet protect Chibi Usa as she is destined to succeed Sailor Moon and needs a posse of her own.

What does this mean for Pluto then? Well probably nothing. But hey maybe she’ll change camps and go protect Chibi Usa. Fitting though that of all the planets this should happen to it would be Pluto considering she is the one who in 30th century Crystal Tokyo is shown to have a close personal relationship with Chibi Usa while the other girls are still taking care of the Queen. Pluto who’s mentioned to be both the same and different from the other girls as she has that different duty of protecting the Door of Time really is the odd planet out.

According to AICN, a new Thundercats show is in the works from WB Animation.

WB animation is remaking the Thundercats as an animated TV series.
The animation style is whimsical, Americanized-anime, along the lines of Teen Titans.
The setting is modern-day Earth, in a major city (possibly LA)
The Thundercats are all teenagers.
Their leader is Snarf (!) who is now a mystic with a “third” eye.
Each of the Thundercats has a weapon with an “Eye of Thunderra” and transformative powers (not just Lion-O)
When they aren’t fighting evil, the Thundercats play together as a rock band. That’s not a typo, or a joke. They are rockin’ cats in their present form.
Mum-Ra now has wings.
And I bet he laughs a bit more than he used to =P
Developing…

I think the best comment from that page was here. I’m not sure they could be more unfaithful to the original material if they wanted. Where are the Four Horsemen when you need them?

It seems that Aint It Cool News has leaked 4 pictures of what the Decepticon leader, Megatron, will look like. I have mirrored the images after the jump. As always, if you don’t want to be spoiled, then don’t click to read the rest of this story. These images don’t reveal anything about the movie itself. They are simply pictures of Megatron, himself.

I’m having a very neutral reaction to most of these designs. I’m having a little more trouble with this one, but if you squint really hard looking at his standard mode face, it sort of looks like Megabolt Megatron‘s head… sort of…
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Despite promises that its delays will end comic books and the universe as a whole, we still get three crossovers this week. And with every purchase, I feel a little bit more like a whore. Today we’re blessed with Heroes For Hire #1, New Avengers #23, and Wolverine #45.

Heroes For Hire not only deals with the pros and cons to registration – and the Registration Act as a whole – but it even paints the Pro side in a positive light. I’m stunned. B+ / A+ for that bad boy.
New Avengers reaffirms that Iron Man, SHIELD, and (by default) the whole Pro side is full of tools. It gets a C / F.
Wolverine deals with that Atlantis sleeper agent plot from Frontline, and it’s a nice story to boot, warranting a B / C-.

Read on to for details, and prepare get spoiled like that month-old salmon in my fridge.

[Read the rest of this entry…]

Elephantmen #2
written by Starkings, art by Henry Flint and Moritat

This strange little book is being put out by Image right now. I guess it’s not a new series/universe they’re working with, but it’s something the creators have been doing for a little while. I think they’re calling this group of stories “Hip Flask“. Or it’s the name of that universe. I have no idea really, so it was a gamble when I picked up their first issue with Image last month. I’m pleased to say it rocked my nether regions ever so gently. More details, and links to previews after the jump…
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Slashdot posted the cancellation of Stargate SG-1. The show will not be renewed for another season. Stargate Atlantis will continue on for its fourth season.

The SCI-FI network offered the following statement:

“SCI FI Channel is proud to be the network that brought Stargate SG-1 to its record-breaking 10th season. Ten seasons and 215 episodes is an astounding, Guinness World Record-setting accomplishment. Stargate is a worldwide phenomenon. Having achieved so much over the course of the past 10 years, SCI FI believes that the time is right to make this season their last on the channel. SCI FI is honored to have been part of the Stargate legacy for five years, and we look forward to continuing to explore the Stargate universe with our partners at MGM through a new season of Stargate Atlantis.”

Quote Source: Gateworld